the bittersweet ugly

I'm hooked on DARS bittersweet chocolate. I love dark chocolates - any brands. But DARS i just so happened to buy it cos it was on promotion at Shell. (You know how they keep asking u to buy their products on promotion when u're making payment) Anyways, I always go "No thanks" or when I'm actually feeling friendly that moment I'd say "Oh no thanks.. I wish man! But I'm on a diet lah.. I had so many chocolates this whole week.. Heheh.. Must cut down..." Really, I say this exact same line ALL the time that I feel friendly. But yeah, this time around DARS bittersweet chocolate was on promotion and I just couldnt resist simply because the packaging was BLACK and BLACK DARK BITTER chocolate just turns me on. I love DARS. It comes in individual cubes that you dont have to break, just pop and let it sit on your tounge while it slowly dissolves in the mouth for a good 8 minutes. I dont have to smoke forever if I constantly have this in my mouth. In fact, I have it in my mouth now. *Heaven*

Anyways, most of you would probably know that I work for the most singaporean of singaporean company in singapore. The epitomy of chingchongs-aunty-uncle-apeks and nonyas of a company. One that I shall not name just in case I get implicated. My job allows me to meet the worst of the lot. Everyday is a wakeup call that I no longer live in Melbourne (where I was for almost 4 years). A reminder that I lived and grew up in this type of society. This way of life we have adopted called 'Kiasuism'. Every single goddamn day I get this awakening - this reality slap to my face. Where I work, is a total contrast to my life outside this cubicle (thank you god! thank you parents! thank you dannie! thank you brothers! thank you friends!). I have had people coming up to my cubicle oggling at picures of my life and asking me if one of them was taken in a studio:

One aunty: Waaaaahh... so nice this picture! which studio u go take wan?
Me (almost died): Nolah.. This is a real place lah. In Australia...
That aunty: Sure or not??? Look so fake like studio wan! U sure or not...? (lifting up her glasses to look closer at the picture)
Me: Yes sure... Of cos lah... Where got studio picture like this!
The Aunty: Wah so nice ah... When u go? .....

Anyways, that's not just it. I also get to read, listen to the worst of complaints. Customer cursing over a 2% discount (fyi: every tuesday, senior citizens get 2% discount. tell your granparents) we did not give him for the 60 cents newspaper he purchased. Which amounted to *brace yourselves* 0.012 cents. When we told him the amount, you cant blame us for sounding like we were mocking him. He blew up and demanded the 0.012 cents back cos it's still money to him. (and let's not forget that we always round down the bill, instead of rounding up like restaurants for these ungratefools) And we had to ask him how do we repay him 0.012 cents? Should we round down to 1 cents or round up to 2 cents? You know what? I'm feeling generous, here's 10 cents, you cheap bastard!

I'm gonna start dedicating my blogs to the handful minority of the most ugliest, cheapest, mothafreakin' parasitic singaporeans of the Republic of Singapore. So stay tuned for that.....

In the meantime, if you're a dark chocolate lover like myself, go grab DARS today!

(disclaimer: DARS pte ltd did not pay me to advertise their chocolates for them)